My new address is http://pursuingtitus2.com.

My beloved husband has created a beautiful new site for me. Please come visit me over at the new Pursuing Titus 2. And don’t forget to change your links and point your RSS reader at the new site. I don’t want to miss any of you!

Help Free Gao Zhisheng

Knowing this, that our old man is crucified with him, that the body of sin might be destroyed, that henceforth we should not serve sin. For he that is dead is freed from sin….Let not sin therefore reign in your mortal body, that ye should obey it in the lusts thereof. –Romans 6:6,7,12

Free. It’s so familiar, a gospel fundamental. The Lord saves us and sets us free from sin. We don’t have to obey our former master anymore.

This morning, cuddled up with my nursing baby, and prepping for a Bible study, I came across those words again, “freed from sin.” I don’t have to serve sin. But I could. I could still obey sin, otherwise there wouldn’t be any words of warning against letting it reign in my mortal body. But in order to obey, there has to be a command. And that made me wonder, what does the command sound like? How do I hear my former master’s voice?

I hear it in my flesh, my “mortal body,” “in the lusts thereof.” It is the overwhelming feeling that I must do something wrong. The anger welling up within me when I do not get my way, the jealousy that taunts me when I see what others have that my flesh desperately wants, the selfishness, dissatisfaction, the compelling frustration, the feeling that I just “can’t help” being closed in on myself and joyless, the sin, like instinct; these things that seem to come from within me, that whisper that this is who I am, inescapably, without hope of control, that tell me I can’t, I can’t say no, I must feel this, and maybe scream, or yell, or make someone else feel as bad as I do–they are the commands, they are the sound of my former master’s voice. Authoritative. Powerful. To hear is to obey.

But I am free.

This is nothing more than shouting in the street. I do not have to listen. I can simply walk away.

I used to be so bothered by these attempts at returning me to slavery. I was torn, squirming, guilty that I was feeling this or that, and yet feeling such compulsion to wallow in it and act on it. “I’m having a hard day.” “I’m sorry I said that, but you just made me SO MAD.” “I can’t help that. I’ve always felt like that, ever since I was a little girl.” “If you just knew what this person or that person did to me, then you’d understand why I have to be this way.” But lying there with my Bible study, I realized that what freedom means is that I actually can just turn away. I don’t have to be upset about all these feelings and compulsions anymore. My flesh can shout all it wants. I do not have to obey.

Obviously, there is no hope of rejecting my former master’s commands if I am not clinging to my new Master, the Lord Jesus Christ, who set me free to serve Him. It is only through His power that I have any hope of escaping. But through His power, I can reject even the sin of my own flesh, the voice of my former master.

I am free.

Jesus answered them, Verily, verily, I say unto you, Whosoever committeth sin is the servant of sin….If the Son therefore shall make you free, ye shall be free indeed. –John 8:34,36