Comments on: A Garden Enclosed: The Importance of Modesty…and Immodesty

By: lynne

lynne — Mon, 10 Nov 2008 05:01:27 +0000

this is to the wives who’s husbands who like them to look sexy in public. For a long time my husband and I were backslidden, not in church and not in God’s will. I dressed immodestly and my husband encouraged it, he wanted me to dress very sexy in public and wanted other men to look at me, ogle me, lust after me. When we got back into church I started feeling convicted about my dress and started to change. I told my husband that dressing immodestly was not honoring to him and his wanting me to dress that was was not honoring to me. I wish I had felt that way all along and never dishonored my husband by dressing immodestly in public, but I will say I love to let him help me buy sexy underwear and nighties to wear in the bedroom. Being sexy for your husband makes him feel wanted and special that you have something no other man gets to see.

By: Kendra

Kendra — Tue, 29 Jul 2008 03:45:35 +0000

I was interested in the comment the writer made that “the Bible doesn’t give hard and fast rules about it, yet we are commanded to dress modestly.”
I agree that the Bible does not draw a human body marking the areas God deems necessary to be covered. (This may be to avoid individuals aiming for as little as possible to still scrape by.)
However, the Bible does mention some specifics about what is considered “nakedness,” and therefore shameful.
Ex 28:42 & Isa. 47:2-3 both mention the thigh as an inappropriate or shameful part of the body to expose.
Isa 20:4 speaks of the buttocks and Ezekiel 16:7 mentions breasts in relation to nakedness.
These are just a few but they do show us some of the places we ought to cover up in public. Just some food for thought.

By: Mrs. Parunak

Mrs. Parunak — Wed, 28 May 2008 18:01:36 +0000

Ladies,

Recently, I have had to delete a few comments from this thread because the people writing them did not actually say anything. The comments were merely designed to shock those with conservative sensibilities or to call them names. In response to this, I have added Comment Guidelines to the top of my page. Those with dissenting opinions are more than welcome to join the discussion here, but if they would like their comments to be posted, they need to adhere to the guidelines.

By: Aurora Kat

Aurora Kat — Wed, 28 May 2008 03:11:51 +0000

I found this by way of the lovely Anna’s blog (^.^) and read ALL of it … and wanted to say, I found it very beautiful and inspiring. ~ As to those who say we are trying to “demonize sexuality” and “limit lust” or whatnot … just remember that Christ said, we are meant to live in the world but be of GOD not *of the world*… .

As for myself ~ I am not married and do struggle with what it means to be a modest woman, ESPECIALLY in the world we live in today … and to dress modestly but not frumpy; to cultivate academic skill and institutional respect while still being a Godly woman. WHEW it’s sometimes a lot to handle. … Thank God that He leads us. (^.^)

*~* Peace! *~*

By: Rachel

Rachel — Sun, 25 May 2008 04:05:27 +0000

The other day my husband was at a open house at Wood craft, the asked for anyone who had a picture of his wife in his wallet to come up and get a prize….. Caleb wasn’t anywhere near the front but he went up anyway with his wallet (with my picture) and apparently was the only one in the store who had a picture of his wife in his wallet. (he won me a travel mug:-)

the picture was taken just for him, I am dressed modestly, but the look on my face is very immodest but he is probably the only one that would recognize that.

The gift of sexuality is so special husbands and wives should treasure it.

By: Maria

Maria — Sat, 24 May 2008 21:55:48 +0000

I think I just lost what I’d written so here it goes again! A few years back I witnessed muslim women clad in all-covering garments and veil shopping for very sexy lingerie in Paris. I was dumbfounded, perplex, astonished… it just didn’t make sense so I thought at the time. Ah well, it’s taken me well over a decade since this incident to understand (and agree) where they were coming from!

By: Samirah

Samirah — Fri, 23 May 2008 23:19:22 +0000

Hi! Thank you for sharing words of wisdom on the issue of modest dress. Your very beautiful and poetic comparison to a garden was delightful!
I’m a muslim and thought that I would share with you our approach to the subject. I’m sure that you and your readers have all seen pictures of muslim women in their headscarves (hijab). What a lot of people don’t realize is that we don’t where them in the house under normal circumstances. When at home the scarves and overcoats come off and the beautiful dress underneath is revealed. Inside our homes we are encouraged to dress beautifully with full makeup,perfume, etc. for our husbands and family. Of course, in the privacy of the bedroom we take it a step further and wear more revealing clothing.
Many times our homes are arranged so that visitors(male)can come in to a sitting area that is either curtained off or in a separate room from the main family area so the women (wife and daughters) don’t need to cover in the house while they are present. Many times an interior courtyard is included so the women can go outdoors without covering and enjoy the sunshine.
These arrangements are in obedience to God’s will and out of respect for ourselves and the good men who do not wish to see someone else’s ‘garden’ and as a protection from the evil men who do.
May God bless your efforts in His Cause

By: Mrs. Parunak

Mrs. Parunak — Thu, 22 May 2008 01:47:08 +0000

Jill,

I think that your husband is absolutely right about “modest” in 1 Timothy 2:9-10 meaning not dressing in a flashy manner, trying to draw attention to yourself. However, I believe that showing off our bodies is inconsistent with not drawing attention to ourselves. I once heard a great sermon by Jeff Pollard on this topic. He put it very well that the point of the word “modesty” is that our dress should not scream, “Look at me!” So, clothes that say, “Look at me! I’m so rich,” would be immodest, as would clothes that say, “Look at me! I have fabulous taste,” or, most importantly for the current discussion, “Look at me! I have great legs, gorgeous cleavage, and a tiny little waist line.”

On another note, good for you for figuring this all out with your husband. This is a crucial area in our marriages, and it’s wonderful that you aren’t leaving your husband out of something that effects him so greatly.

By: Jill

Jill — Thu, 22 May 2008 00:29:06 +0000

In response to Kate,
I have the same dilemma. My husband likes me to dress very attractive and sometimes I feel immodest. He says 1 Tim. 2:9-10 is not talking about covering up but using the word modesty in the other form. For example one might say they had a modest meal, meaning not much to eat. In other words, just don’t dress in a flashy manner, trying to draw attention to yourself. And I agree with him as far as that verse goes. But there are other verses that make me think I should dress more modestly. I have thought about trying to spice up our sex life more. That might help to keep his desire for me to be sexy fulfilled, and then maybe he will be okay with me dressing more modestly when we go out. He’s a very Godly man, so I’m not too worried. We’ll figure it out together.

By: Kate

Kate — Wed, 21 May 2008 21:02:04 +0000

Mrs. Parunak,
Thank you for your insight. I think I will gently broach the idea of asking other men to sin, my husband might not even realize that this is what he is asking for, when he asks me to dress in an alluring manner.
Thank you and Blessings
~Kate