Comments on: Starving in a World of Free Samples: Why Sheltering Isn’t Enough

By: Mrs. Parunak

Mrs. Parunak — Sat, 07 Mar 2009 01:58:06 +0000

My dear, dear Unhappy Wife,

Lord willing I will send you an e-mail in the next few days, and we can keep this discussion going personally.

I will be praying for you.

By: Unhappy wife

Unhappy wife — Fri, 06 Mar 2009 22:51:20 +0000

Hello, I hope you read this comment even though your post is older. What do you suggest for the husband who will not leave porn alone, and even does it when children are awake (although not in the room)? I confronted him about 3 years ago about this and told him if I found more I would leave, but now we have 5 children and one on the way. I do work at a pretty well-paying job part time, but was hoping to decrease my hours. He is also somewhat verbally abusive and pretty much ignores the children. I would love to leave even though I don’t believe in divorce. If nothing else, please pray for us.

By: Mrs. Parunak

Mrs. Parunak — Thu, 22 Jan 2009 04:13:39 +0000

Linda,

“Do all the Christian swim suits have to be covered in flowers?” LOL! That’s priceless. A friend of mine has put together her own (flowerless) modest swimming outfit by covering a conventional suit with a pair of long board shorts, and then wearing a women’s “rash guard” on top. Rash guards are swim shirts that come in a huge array of fabrics including every solid color you could ever hope for. They are very stretchy, so buy BIG if you don’t want it to cling.

Also, I have a link to WholesomeWear in my sidebar. I have one of their suits, and I LOVE it. They have many fabrics in solid colors and/or flower free patterns.

I hope this helps.

By: Linda

Linda — Wed, 21 Jan 2009 21:45:20 +0000

Dear Mrs P,At the beach I wear board shorts and tankini, mainly to cover bits I don’t like but I now realise it’s important for modesty.Do all the christian swim suits have to be covered in flowers ? Also, when the original people made the art works in galleries were they made purely to show the beauty of the human form or was there just alittle bit of lust involved..hmm.?Blessings from Linda.

By: Mrs. Parunak

Mrs. Parunak — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 02:17:40 +0000

Linda,

I’m afraid I don’t know off hand of any magazines for boys. I’m delighted you mentioned Girlhood Companion, though. I had never heard of them before. I just went to their website, and they look lovely! I’m going to tuck them away in my memory for when my oldest girl gets to be ten.

I hope someone else is able to chime in on this one with some good advice for you.

By: Linda

Linda — Wed, 14 Jan 2009 01:48:58 +0000

Sorry to add another letter, I know of the magazine girlhood companion and internet site genteel girlhood, is there anything similar for homeschool boys? We get clubhouse at the moment and we can’t do keepers as we live in another country.I know pumpkinseed sells good manuals like keepers, doorposts etc but is there something interactive for tthe children like the girl ones so they can interact with similar peers and share life problems?

By: Linda

Linda — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 21:33:38 +0000

Dear Mrs P, well done.I read Sears years ago and he recommended teaching sex education from 4, I was lucky enough to have the book he recommended, I got it second hand.A little bit of this education plus a good understanding of what God wants for our lives goes a long way in protecting and arming children for the battle of morals ahead of them.T thank God for books like beautiful girlhood and similar ones for boys that prepare them for a beautiful adults only relationship with the one they love for life, my kids sure see the result of the other by looking around them in the paper, associates etc.Linda

By: Rina

Rina — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 19:25:56 +0000

Mrs. P,
Once again, you have written an excellent, inspiring article! My husband has also read “Every Man’s Battle” and loves it. A friend of mine advised us to train our boys from the time they’re very young (i.e. age three or so) to turn away from images such as these. So we’ve taught our boys AND girls to look away from a woman who is dressed inapropriately, or a man without a shirt on. I like this approach for when they’re too young to understand Proverbs 5-9 because then by the time they ARE old enough to understand why they need to do it, it’s already become a habit.

By: Gene (Mr. P)

Gene (Mr. P) — Mon, 12 Jan 2009 04:37:16 +0000

Doug,

I’m not sure Mrs. P and I understand where your disagreement is. Maybe you can elaborate.

The title of the post indicates that sheltering (by itself) is woefully insufficient to ensure future success in purity. Children need their parents to teach them about lust and to show them how to flee from it. But I think that’s the very point the post makes, so I won’t belabor it. I’d be interested to know what you see differently.

Maybe the following isn’t your experience, but when you talk about “resisting temptation”, I can’t help but think of my own past – and what passed for “resistance”.

As a man who previously spent many years actively feeding his unchecked lusts, I’m accustomed to hearing (or quietly making) the argument that it couldn’t possibly be wrong for me to take a second (or lingering) look at any female form that passes. “God couldn’t possibly have meant for me to keep my eyes off of THAT!!!”, “I’m just appreciating God’s creation, I’m not lusting”, etc… What I’ve discovered, however, is that nothing could be further from the truth. Immediately pointing my eyes somewhere else is the only solution. We’re kidding ourselves if our definition of “resistance” includes a lingering gaze at any woman we’re not married to.

Ladies, ask your husband about his definition of resistance.

Men, GET REAL.

To your point, Doug, I certainly don’t FEAR magazine covers, internet ads, or under-dressed women in my daily life – but I have come to resent them.

By: Doug

Doug — Sun, 11 Jan 2009 20:40:37 +0000

I think your approach to sheltering your children is misguided. Do you really want them to spend their lives terrified of accidently glancing at a magazine? Maybe it would be better to give them the tools to resist temptation not just hide it from them.